IC Inbox

[swordboning]

...you've reached Archer. Leave a message and if it's suitable, I'll get back to you.

Comments

[codere]

Are you refusing to feed me now? [ Loosening her grip a little now that they're closer to the ground. ]

I'm already malnourished. I'll die at this rate.

[swordboning]

No. We're simply staying here until you learn to act your age.

[Whatever age that is. Which is an age that doesn't make dumb jokes about dates.]

[codere]

My age?

What are you implying with something like that, Archer? [ It's enough for her to release her grip on him, plopping fully to the floor. ]

[swordboning]

I'm implying that you're acting somewhere between 5 and 12 years old and no more.

That is a good example.

[The plopping on the floor thing.]

[codere]

Aren't the Japanese always close to the floor? Sitting on their knees for their meals and sleeping on mats? You act as if it's a crime for me to lay around.

[ She's also a rude shit. ] I don't actually remember how old I am. It must be a side effect of being uploaded to the Moon Cell.

[swordboning]

Don't hide behind either of those as an excuse. You know full well that you're an adult so you should act like one.

[codere]

[ Sitting up a bit, she rocks in place as she considers how to answer him. ]

Hm, I know that. When the time comes where I have to act an adult, I will. Until then, what's the problem with me taking it easy?

[swordboning]

You don't have a job. You don't earn money. You don't do any chores. Do you see my problem here with you taking it easy?

[codere]

Oh, that's because you seemed too eager to do all the work yourself so I thought why should I ruin your fun?

[ She stops rocking, leaning in closer towards him. ] Are you afraid your Master is a useless loach?

[swordboning]

[Not phased!]

I should have expected it but, even then, not on this level. Name one positive thing you've done since you've been here.

[codere]

I'm responsible for you and Emiya's little peace treaty, aren't I? Don't think I'm not aware of it.

[swordboning]

That is a stretch, at best. At worst, it's attempting to take credit for something you haven't done.

No, from now on, unless you can contribute effectively, you're going to be under a strict regimen.

[codere]

A strict regimen? [ What is he going on about now?? ]

Explain yourself, Archer.

[swordboning]

Until you find out how to do things that are useful for myself and you, I'll be making up your daily schedule.

[codere]

[ Whew. ] For a moment there, I almost took you seriously. What a mean Halloween prank to play on someone!

[swordboning]

If you keep thinking it's a joke when you wake up tomorrow, you may have a surprise. Either way, I'll have what you need to do posted on the refrigerator.

[codere]

I'm just not going to wake up tomorrow. [ Problem solved.

She's such an engineer! ]

[swordboning]

You're welcome to try. Take advantage of today as much as you can.

Or better yet, find out a way you can contribute before tomorrow rolls around.

[codere]

Is that all I need to do?

If I can contribute to our way of living in a night, you'll back off? [ Does she sound as if she's considering it........... ]

[swordboning]

It'll have to last more than one night but yes. We'll start with baby steps.

[codere]

[ She's not a miracle worker, Archer..!!! ]

All right, I'll start tonight by... [ Hm.

Silence. ]

[swordboning]

Good. Anything else or are you actually going to sit on the couch?

[codere]

If I sit on the couch, will you change your mind??

[swordboning]

I might be swayed in one direction or another.

[codere]

[ SCRAMBLES TO THE COUCH.

She even sits with her hands in her lap............................ See, she's a nice girl, please don't make her do the chores. ]