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[swordboning]

...you've reached Archer. Leave a message and if it's suitable, I'll get back to you.

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[swordboning]

[Setting out some chicken coated in a spicy sauce with the prerequisite vegetables on the table in front of the couch.]

I'm done. If you're taking a nap, at least take a few moments to eat.

[codere]

[ She wakes up easily enough, sitting upright and turning towards the scent of the food. ] No, I just dozed off while waiting for you.

[ It isn't her fault that it takes so long to cook. ]

Eat with me? [ Rin makes the usual meaningless request as she settles down on the floor between the couch and the table. ]

[swordboning]

[Archer honestly expected that request and made enough to two. Just all on one plate.

Still, he passed a set of chopsticks to Rin and sat opposite of her.]

Of course.

[codere]

[ Can't blame her for asking, but she's pleased he agreed to it for once. Pulling apart the chopsticks, she'll work on getting them set up in her hands. It'll take her a little while to get used to them again but at least she's as dexterous as usual. ]

What is it we're supposed to say before a meal?

[swordboning]

"Thank you Archer for making this meal"?

[WHELP.]

[codere]

Is that it? [ Lifting her head to look up at him, she smiles. ]

Thank you, Archer. For making us this meal.

Please let's enjoy it.

[swordboning]

[Rin, you sweet summer child.

Okay, taking up a bite in his own chopsticks.]

Of course.

[codere]

[ Time to dig in, which she does so readily. Shoveling it into her mouth with the chopsticks, she just keeps her mouth low to the plate and full of food. She must have been really hungry. ]

[swordboning]

[Of course she was hungry, she's always hungry. Archer takes his time, though, so Rin can take as much food as she wants.]

[codere]

[ Every so often she'll pause to make sure he's eating before resuming her own actions. After she's stuffed her face enough, she'll look him over thoughtfully. ]

... so how many cute girls have you been cooking for in my absence?

[swordboning]

Just one household full. Though I wouldn't call them cute. Most are simply annoying in one way or another.

[Thankfully, he's said the same to them so no biggie.]

[codere]

That isn't a very nice thing to say, Archer. [ Don't worry, she'll scold him for it. ]

This is why you have no friends.

[swordboning]

And you have multitudes to brag about.

[codere]

I have a friend. [ A SINGLE FRIEND. ]

[swordboning]

[Wait for it.

The smug, shit eating grin.]

And I have two. You'll have to work a little harder at this, Rin.

[codere]

You do not have two friends.

[ Shit, Rin needs two more friends at least. ]

[swordboning]

Try Athena and Rei. If you pull out your fingers, you might find out that it adds up to two.

[codere]

You can't be friends with a Master. [ Or else they would be friends?! ]

It's against the rules.

[swordboning]

I don't remember anything like that being written down. Besides, she's not a Master anymore so it wouldn't apply to her.

[codere]

She was a Master at one point so it counts. [ It does, it does count. Don't argue it with her!! ]

So we both only have a single friend each.

[swordboning]

I'm not agreeing to your requirements so it's still two for me, one for you. Anyway, I told another girl to be your friend so you just have to go along with her and we'd be tied.

[codere]

You can't bully people into being my friend, Archer. [ A friendship has to be mutual and sadly Rin fails to think of others as her equal in most situations. ]

Naruto came back but... [ He doesn't remember her. How can they be friends then? ]

[swordboning]

No but I can bribe them.

[Y-e-p.]

Another idiot? You certainly like to surround yourself with them.

[Really, Archer is here too.]

[codere]

[ So was Shirou when he was around. ] Mm, he doesn't remember so I'm not going to bother with it a second time.

[ What a sad thing to say but Rin is too much of a realist to pursue things that will end with hurt feelings. ]

[swordboning]

That's oddly fatalistic. Well, I won't blame you but even relationships in real life tend to vanish like that.